Social networking or relationship building – What to do to not have to delete people from your friend list.


In the pursuit of knowledge, something is added every day. In the pursuit of enlightenment, something is dropped every day.

– Lao Tzu –

There have been countless posts on Facebook/LinkedIn with details focusing on:

I am in process of cleaning up my friendlist to only include people who are “real” friends. If you would like to stay in touch, click “Like” and post “ME” below to tell me you want to stay in my friendlist.

There are people who posted this type of posts. I discover that I am still on their friendlist even though I haven’t “liked” nor commented on their post. So what are they trying to do?

I have no interest in knowing.

So what to do instead:

  1. Before requesting or accepting a friend request from someone, have a conversation with that person. Build a relationship first. In many cases, those who sending you a request won’t bother to have a conversation with you. Tell them to follow you instead and decline their request. This will save you time later on and you won’t have to step #2.
  2. Before deleting someone, tell them first. If they don’t reply in a week, delete them.

Having 5000 in your friendlist and knowing only 10 of them is worse than having 100 on your list and knowing all of them.

Keep in mind that: people don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.

Quality relationships trump quantity relationships.

P/S: if you are on my friend list, I appreciate you. If you want to clean up your friend list and we don’t know each other, you can follow step #2 directly.